Saturday, January 26, 2008

Why Women Stop Having Sex by Blond Bombshell



Why Women Stop Having Sex -by Blond Bombshell

Viper let’s throw down the gloves and get to the real point of Thursday’s article concerning ten rules for men. You want to know why women stop having sex after they are married. Admit it! That is why you think most relationships fail. It is a common compliant that once women get married or into a LTR, they suddenly stop having sex. Men wonder what happened. Other men accuse women of using a bait a switch tactic.
After years listening to both sides, I give Legal Pub readers a list of things that can go wrong and cause a women to lose interest.



It is because the woman:




l. was more interested in the wedding then the man.
2. was more invested in the baby then the relationship.


3. was never that sexual in the first place. She always had issues that surrounded sex.
4. was just a bitch and sex is all about control.
5. was adversely effected by the pill. It reduces libido in 30% of women.


6. has become bored. Instead of hot lust she gets the same brand of sex every time.
7. has let herself get out of shape so that she doesn’t even want to see her self naked.
8. has forgotten how important sex is to her mate..
9. lives in a little girl dream world of happily ever after without grounding in reality.



10. expects a man to be able to go with out because she can.
11. forgets to act like a girl friend instead of as a wife and mother..
12. stops being a female and instead becomes a sexless creature.
13 is having an affair.
14 never tells him what she wants because he should just know.
15 refuses to let go of past fights, arguments and hurt feelings.

Women also go cold because the man:


1. treat’s her like crap and expects that to not matter.
2. acts like a little boy forcing her to play mom.( No mother wants to sleep with her son.)
3. acts like her father instead of her lover.
4. only shows affection when he is horny.
5. talks at her not to her or not at all.
6. gets too comfortable and use the toilet with the door open.
7. has a affair.
8. insists on sex acts that he knows are a huge turn off.
9. demands too much sex.(I.e. everyday 3 x a day.)


10. tell her she is fat, stupid, boring, or a nag.
11. talks about his hot new co-worker
12. spends way too much time apart from her with porn, his friends, or his sports.
13. lets himself go.



14. forgets to say” I love you” and “ I’m sorry,”
15. forgets special occasions.



16. forgets to treat her like a sweetheart.
17. is too selfish of a lover.



That’s the secret Viper. Memorize the list and tell all your male clients how to keep a sexual marriage. This is my pre Valentines gift to all you married men wanting to stay married!







Shell





Legal Pub Update: The comments are awesome and good enough to be their own separate stories. Thanks for all the great authors and scholars' opinions!


70 comments:

Anonymous said...

Shell, dudette, good list but you missed the real reason, the wedding cake. Let me prove it.

Almost every wedding, the bride eats wedding cake.

After eating the cake, in almost every marriage the amount of sex almost instantaneously declines or stops all together.

Must be some kind of suppressant in the batter...

Surfer Dude

Anonymous said...

Love it! I waited all morning for Legal Pubs Sat story which are always my favorites. Shell, you knocked this one out of the park!


Jill

Anonymous said...

You go girl! Excellent summary. About time some one let the men know the truth.

Brenda

Anonymous said...

Iron Mike said...

I can't say I disagree with too much on the list. It is a two sided problem and Shell does a decent job of exposing everything except for what is under her skirt.

Iron Mike

Anonymous said...

Wondered if any one else sat around on Saturdays waiting for the week end pub to come out.

I have been married over 50 years. My wife and I have had a healthy sexual relationship from the day we were married to the present. Can never complain, but then it is obvious that she treats me right!

Ralph

Anonymous said...

Why some women don't and they don't regret it!

Come on over to our side of life and you will never go back!

Bertha

Ms Calabaza said...

Shell, great post. And, Iron Mike even agreed with you ~ Wow! What more could you want?

Viper said...

Shell, here is a distillation of my experience:

1. 70% of all women initiate divorce.

2. 90% of all male infidelity is caused by their mates with holding sex either as punishment or to try to "change them."

3. That 95% of married men who engage in sexual relationships with their wives at least 3 times a week remain faithful throughout the marriage.

4. That a woman who is not being either physically or mentally abused will not file for divorce unless she has another significant other on the side or close friends or family who do not like her spouse and are encouraging and facilitating the break up.

5. That documented physical or mental abuse is an appropriate reason for a woman to remove herself from the relationship.

6. That a common source of marital discord is fighting concerning careers and control of family finances.

7. That successful marriages tend to have one partner who is dominant (i.e. Lee's scenario in the other thread) and one partner who is submissive.

8. That in the majority of divorces where there is not abuse, the spouses are pretty much 50/50. This breeds competition instead of facilitation and leads to vicious arguments culminating in divorce.

9.That vicious litigious divorces often result in ongoing custody disputes and arguments concerning visitation and kids welfare. For that reason I support Legal Pub's proposal to reduce domestic violence by awarding 50/50 physical custody and each paying into a fund to support the children.

10.That opposite personality types make for better working relationships. The couples still must have similar interests, but as one poster said, you can't have two head coaches.

Anonymous said...

Sometimes it is just too hard to say I love you...

Anonymous said...

From Schindler's list to Shell's list. Oh boy...

Scarlett Pumpkin said...

Well said, Shell.

I truly believe it has absolutely very little to do with actual sex. It's about control. Very few people are completely submissive. Most people want at least a bit of control in their lives. For women who are the submissive in the relationship, that control is sex. In some relationships it is the only thing a woman has control over - her body. I don't think it is necessarily right to withhold - playing games like that only breads more resentment. I think, though, if you plan to be the dominant in the relationship, you're going to have to prepare for a bit of resistance.

Anonymous said...

I agree with Jess, it is all about control! But I think it back fires. I tried to change my husband by with holding sex. It worked. He changed. He went from being a faithful guy to sleeping with my best girl friend.

I did not realize how powerful a man's sex drive must be. My hubby and I reconciled and I now try to use other things to shape his behavior. But I will never make the mistake of with holding sex ever again.


Jan

Anonymous said...

Jan, I could not resist once I read your story of your hubby sleeping with your best friend.

My aunt was told by her doctor that she had terminal cancer and that she needed to "put her affairs in order." My aunt and my cousin then went out and got drunk. At the bar they were approached by some of my aunt's girl friends who were curious as to what the two were celebrating.

My aunt explained they were drinking to her impending
end because she had been diagnosed with "AIDS."

The other women were aghast, gave their condolences and split.

After the friends left, my cousin asked, 'Momma, I thought you said you were dying of cancer, and you just told your friends you were dying of AIDS.

My aunt said, 'I don't want any of those darn women sleeping with your father after I'm gone.'

From my dearly departed aunt, I learned what it means to 'Put Your Affairs In Order.'

Surfer Dude

Anonymous said...

That would be a great idea Surfer Dude. Grandma

Legal Pub said...

This should be paired with Jill's story for 3-5-08!

Anonymous said...

Stumbled onto this Blond Bombshell article and loved it. If you are not writing for Hollywood, you should be. Comments are awesome by all you folks too!

J.P.

Anonymous said...

This is actually real legitimate, good advice by the Bombshell!

Anonymous said...

Bombshell is the bomb!

Anonymous said...

To be blunt, some women just don't like sex. These women have sex with a guy in the beginning of the relationship to "land him," but once they have him where they want him, they don't feel that they have to have sex with him anymore.

For these women, sex is power. Sex is a weapon they use to "reel in" men, and not a fun activity they enjoy.

Dr. Destructo

Anonymous said...

Some of us are just plain bored!

Anonymous said...

Some of us are just plain bored!

Anonymous said...

Some of us do not want sex to be the basis of our relationship or marriage.

Anonymous said...

A lawyer married a woman who had previously been married 12 times.
On their wedding night, the bride said to her new groom, "Please, promise to be gentle, I am still a virgin."
This puzzled the groom who thought at least one of her previous husbands would have serviced her.

She went on to explain:
"My first husband was a Sales Representative who spent our entire
marriage telling me, in grandiose terms, 'It's gonna be great!'
My second husband was from Software Services; he was never quite sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he would send me documentation.
My third husband from Field Services constantly said that everything was diagnostically OK, but he just couldn't get the system up.
My fourth husband from Educational Services simply said, 'Those who can, do; those who can't, teach.'
My fifth husband from the Telemarketing Department said that he had the orders, but he wasn't quite sure when he was going to be able to deliver.
My sixth husband was an Engineer. He told me that he understood the basic process but needed three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method. My seventh husband from Finance and Administration said that he knew how, but he just wasn't sure whether or not it was his job.
My eighth husband from Standards and Regulations told me that he
was up to the standards but regulations failed to explain how to implement it. My ninth husband, a Marketing Manager, said, "I know I have the product. I'm just not sure how to position it." The 10th
was a psychiatrist, and all he ever wanted to do was talk about it. My eleventh was a gynecologist, and all he ever wanted to do was look at it.But my twelfth husband was a stamp collector, and all he ever wanted to do was... ...God I miss him!

But know that I have married a lawyer, I know I'm going to finally get screwed."

Anonymous said...

A more scientific approach is that a lack of desire usually stems from a variety of issues. It is generally the most common sexual problem in America today. The technical term is Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder (HSDD); defined as "a deficiency or absence of sexual fantasies and desire for sexual activity, producing marked personal or interpersonal distress, but not the result of alcoholism, a general medical condition or substance use (medication) or abuse (street drugs)."

The not scientific answer: Go have a fling!

Anonymous said...

Still the best advice on the net!

Anonymous said...

Why Shell does and she doesn't regret it...

Anonymous said...

Shell, you ought to run for president!

Anonymous said...

Shell is a legend. It is so cool she still rubs shoulders with the rest of us in this bottom feeder world.

Thanks Shell. Stay real.

Anonymous said...

Shell, you have a cool way of looking at life.

Anonymous said...

Shell, thanks for taking the time to rub elbows with the rest of us. You are my favorite!

Anonymous said...

Shell gives you a look into the heart of women, look if you dare, men!


Jill

Anonymous said...

It is real simple.Sex is used as a weapon by women. Then the woman wonders why her man found someone else...

Anonymous said...

USA Today reported the number one reason women stop having sex is because of their perception of their own bodies.

Too many women think that men want the perfect body and that keeps these women from being a confident lover!



Horny in Humprey, AL.

Anonymous said...

I just saw on CNN some pastor ordered all married people in his congregation to have sex with their spouse 7 days in a row! Wooped de do. I am converting!

Anonymous said...

I wanna join that church too!

Anonymous said...

I wanna join that church too!

Anonymous said...

Shell, you are so perceptive. You ought to give up acting and start counseling!

A fan.

Anonymous said...

This is where I'm going with the idea. If a guy looks for the marrying kind (that special woman whom you don't mind bringing home to mom), then turns around and complains about having a sexless marriage after he marries her, then was this girl really the marrying kind in the first place?

I think not.

Anonymous said...

This assumes the truth of the widely-accepted belief among men that there are two types of women...one to have fun with and one to marry. So the question that you pose is whether a man is really marrying the right kind of woman when after a year of marriage he is complaining that he gets no sex?

I guess as a woman I would answer that if sex is important to you, don't marry anyone who is not a freak. Cause no matter what the amount of sex will never increase after marriage. Get over it dudes.



Holly

Anonymous said...

Shell this is so true!

Beth

Anonymous said...

Men need to read this again before valentines day.

Anonymous said...

One thing you should never say to your neighbor when he says his wife is frigid: No she aint.

Anonymous said...

True dat!

Anonymous said...

Shell, it is like you can see into my soule. You go girl.


Bobbie

Anonymous said...

Shell you have touched my inner being. Why can't men get it?

Anonymous said...

Shell, you make it so easy for these bozos but they still don't get it.

Anonymous said...

Shell makes it too easy. Why a man who could read might actually be able to sleep in the bedroom.

Anonymous said...

But I have to ask. Why would a loving, wise woman allow mood to determine whether or not she will give her husband one of the most important expressions of love she can show him? What else in life, of such significance, do we allow to be governed by mood?

Anonymous said...

Shell, you have wisdom beyond your years!

Anonymous said...

One cums here and expects dirty photos and instead gets a lesson from a school marm.

Anonymous said...

The title to the article could have been, "Why women do and they don't regret it."

It is about power and control. If a man does not succumb to the threat of getting no sex, than things escalate. The ultimate escalation is divorce where the woman gets half the mans assets, his kids, alimony and child support.

Better off just giving in at the early stage, guys.

Blond Bombshell said...

Just because someone asked L.P., I will answer the following:

Q: What does it mean when a girl says stop.
A: Stop means stop! Do not proceed or it is rape!

Q: If a girl says "no," how can I still have sex with her?
A: No means NO! To continue or to force yourself on a woman cause you think she will like it is RAPE!

Be smart guys.

Shell

Doc said...

This is really a decent summary of the reasons for poor sexual interaction. While not based in psychological research, it still seems very accurate.

Doc

Jimmie said...

Shell how much do you charge for speaking engagements?

Blond Bombshell said...

Headline news today quoted a statistic that those over age 45 are having less sex than that age group had a decade ago. The commentators suggested that the decline in sex could be attributed to financial stress. But those who read my story know the real reason.

Shell

Anonymous said...

less sex means more divorces.

Anonymous said...

more divorces means more money for the lawyers and more congestion for the courts.

Anonymous said...

So less divorce would harm the economy and the great plan for income redistribution?

Anonymous said...

We miss you Shell. Write an up date!

Anonymous said...

Surprisingly a lot of great advice in Shell's words.

Anonymous said...

Surprisingly a lot of great advice in Shell's words.

Anonymous said...

Withholding sex is just an attempt to try to punish your significant other. The end result is a license to cheat!

Anonymous said...

Great job Shell. You hit it exactly.

Legal Pub said...

Shell, we are so lucky to have you as a guest poster. On be half of all men who want to keep their significant other happy, "Thank you."

Val XXX said...

Another 2008 article so ahead of its time. Now Shell's piece on women and sex is practically the bible for men wanting to understand how women think.

Anonymous said...

Luv ya Shell

Anonymous said...

Gues what is it gay if someone's wife get butt naked in webcam for her cousin instead of their own spouse. And no sexual active with a spouse

Blond Bombshell said...

To Anon: While your question is a bunch of nonsense, it brings up an interesting point. Just because a woman is not interested in having sex with her spouse does not mean she is not interested in having sex with someone else. Best wishes, Shell

setnommee said...

Well, my wife always want me to sex her up...but went it time for to do it to me she don't

Anonymous said...

Too bad. So sad