Thursday, June 5, 2008

Did Thieves Motivated By Mathematics Steal Crucifix in Detroit? ~ by Legal Pub


Thieves who stole an 8-foot statue of Jesus Christ off a crucifix on the Church of the Messiah in Detroit were most likely mathematics enthusiasts. Why? Well, did you hear the story of the small boy who started third grade at a public school. He was failing math so his mom switched him to another public school. Again he failed third grade math and his mom enrolled him in parochial school. At the end of the semester he had an "A." The mother asked her son why he suddenly did so well at math. The son responded, "when I first went to the school and saw the priest in charge of the school, I saw they had a man nailed to a plus sign. That made it pretty clear that they took math serious at St. Catherine."
Contrary to Legal Pub's theory, police think the thieves may have stolen the statute thinking it contained copper that could be sold as scrap. But that theory is crap because it is made of plaster.

The Rev. Barry Randolph said the statue looks like copper, but it is only plaster. In the past few months, thieves have damaged copper pipes and stolen aluminum gutters at the church. The congregation has dwindled over the years from about 350 members to about 50.
The church has made a public plea for help. "It is so crazy," Randolph said. Yes, Reverend, a crazy way to motivate kids to do better in math.

12 comments:

california surfer dude said...

Loved it Dude... Only regret is that you beat me to it!

Surfer Dude

your secret L.A. Reader said...

I like this story so much better then the "federal preemption brief." That could give a girl a head ache.

Got to go get some shut eye now...

Your Secret L.A. Reader

Anonymous said...

I needed this kind of motivation in school.

Kate said...

I can't help but wonder who looks at a huge crucifix and says "I'm going to hit the jackpot with this one!"

Anonymous said...

Setting good examples fro math by stealing... brilliant

Ms Calabaza said...

LP,

I went to a parochial school as a kid. The doors were always open and there were gold chalices and all sorts of loot for the taking. Nothing ever happened until I was in my second year of high school when someone vandalized and stole a chalice. Things sure have changed. . .

Anonymous said...

Crazy is as crazy does...



Forrest

Anonymous said...

Math, learn it or wind up hanging over the alter...

Anonymous said...

Oh good old school day pranks...

Anonymous said...

No resale value for plaster

Jester said...

Sister Mary Ann, who worked for a home health agency, was out making her rounds visiting homebound
patients when she ran out of gas. She did not have a gas can so she walked to a near by Exxon station and filled a bed pan with gas.
Sister Mary Ann used the bedpan filled with gas to partially fill her tank.

As she was pouring the gas into her tank, two Lutheran ladies watched from across the street. One turned to the other and said, 'If it starts,
I'm turning Catholic.'

Yet another convert!

Jester

Anonymous said...

Good humor L.P. and Jester!